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Triggers: Creating Behavior That Lasts - Becoming the Person You Want to Be
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Audible Audiobook
Listening Length: 6 hours and 36 minutes
Program Type: Audiobook
Version: Unabridged
Publisher: Random House Audio
Audible.com Release Date: May 19, 2015
Whispersync for Voice: Ready
Language: English, English
ASIN: B00UKE4ZZ2
Amazon Best Sellers Rank:
This book was written by an executive coach. It provides some useful tools for analyzing our situations. It is lucid and an easy read. But having said that, it must also be said that, if you are a person who has been interested in self improvement and have done any reading or thinking about the subject of why we don't achieve what we want, then you are not very likely to find any really new ideas or insights in this book.An example. The author describes four dimensions on the "wheel of change:" Creating, Eliminating, Accepting, Preserving. Pages are given over to describing each one. Then an example is given. An executive is stressed out by his long commute. He lives in the suburbs. He moved there to be close to golf courses. He wants more time with his family and less time driving. The author narrates how the executive uses the "wheel of change" to figure out that he really ought to move closer to his job because he wants more family time and doesn't care about golf as much as he used to. Well, seriously? An "executive" who couldn't have arrived at this insight without the help of the "Wheel of change?" So you get my impatience with this book.But, there are some useful ideas about strategies to live with more intention, more consciousness. If this is the first book of its type that you read you will find it truly brilliant.
This book has some good ideas and tools, but it lacks focus and feels forced. My impression is that Goldsmith wanted to put out another book but didn't have a way to fit his ideas together, so this reads like a series of independent--or perhaps loosely related--ideas with no central organizing structure. There is lots here that isn't exactly relevant to behavior change, he goes off on tangents to fill space, and the end sputters out like a runner trying desperately to reach the finish line (in this case, enough material for a book.. While I definitely took away some interesting and potentially helpful information, it read more like someone just wanted to have product for his seminars and workshops (which he freely admits is his passion and primary interest). Very self-congratulatory and promotional.
Advertising pays: I need to give a shout-out to Jim Kouzes for his posting the cover of Triggers on Facebook. Within thirty minutes of that post, I had ordered my copy!This book deserves a mark that exceeds five stars. This book informed, it educated, it impressed, it entertained, and it induced action. I am in the fourth week of assessing my progress toward six personal, behavioral goals (patience, under-controlling of situations, less judgmental/evaluative, more lovingly supportive of my wife, more at peace, and in less of a hurry). I use the charting process suggested by Marshall, and I have created a weekly scoring sheet on which my wife is to give me grade my progress.Readers might not be impressed with this process, but this is the first time that I have consciously and systematically worked toward important personal/interpersonal goal-improvement. As a licensed user of the MBTI, I have known since 1984 that I have needed to work on some of my ENFJ-behaviors that did not serve me well at times. Marshall’s coaching-in-the-book, his powerful examples of behavior change shared, and the usable resources all combine to compel a reader to take action and make personal progress, so that we might be more effective human beings.After four weeks, this writer is a more peaceful, patient person from the beginning of each day. My wife and I are having more fun. My urge to “drive the bus†all the time has been significantly reduced, and I am in less of a hurry. Marshall’s focus on progress, I think has been key: “Did I do my best to . . .?†Over time, the focus has become a habit, like a good health habit! And, why not?! Yes, I’ll regress on a variable, and I’ll “own it†and simply choose to get back on the horse the next day and go forward.Marshall gets it: He realizes that he cannot be effective unless his clients are! He is exemplary in this regard, and he relentlessly and proactively journeys toward being a better leader/coach.Marshall also models brilliantly, a client-centered/collaborative coaching style as he works with others. He asks the necessary and provocative questions that others need to face if they are to be more effective going forward.There was just one chapter that fell just a tiny bit short, for me personally. Chapter 16, “Behaving Under the Influence of Depletionâ€, deals with our behaviors and the outcomes of decisions made when our physical/mental/emotional energy is low. In addition to Marshall’s suggestions in this chapter, the reader might benefit from three topics that might help them and others be more personally effective: personality (introverts), mood theory, and general wellness. Introverts need to give extra time for reflection and self-care before entering their after-hours dwellings and interacting with others, even their pets. Introvert Power by Laurie Helgoe is just one book that offers practical suggestions for helping introverts be more personally/interpersonally effective. Helgoe specifically offers proactive ideas for helping deal with the current culture of interruption in our daily lives. For mood theory, The Origin of Everyday Moods by Robert Thayer provides resources and research that can make us aware on an hourly basis whether we are “tired†or “energizedâ€. From that point, we can then determine what our next courses of action need to be to be for greater effectiveness going forward. For example, “extreme†extroverts who are tense-tired near the end of a workday are apt to say or do things that would likely not happen when filled with calm-energy. For overall wellness, Candace Pert’s book, Everything You Need to Feel Good, offers an insightful look at her personal journey regarding the successful resolution of health issues, the latest mind/body-research, and good recommendations regarding websites and authors whose contributions might be beneficial.In Triggers, Marshall Goldsmith did everything possible to make real and positive behavioral differences for his readers. He certainly made differences that I think will be both positive and lasting for me and for those with whom I interact. Thank you, sir!
I've made it to the point, after 20 plus years in the same retail business, of co-owning a company. As a person prone to dark moments and fearless angry outbursts I later regret, I have been a longtime seeker of anything that can help me better handle interactions with the people in my life, family, co-workers, employees, customers, etc. I remember, years ago thinking, if I could just gain space between the thing that pushed my buttons and my reaction I would be better off. I would cause less pain to others, I would not be so tortured with regret. This book not only spells out the patterns of trigger/behavior but literally gives you the map of how to rewire the patterns. How to open the space and choose behavior rather than drop into automatic reaction. So grateful to have found this book. Will read it until it is absolutely ingrained in my being, until it is my nature. Can't wait!
I really enjoyed this book. I'm becoming more self-aware and I think Mr. Goldsmith brings in a very unique dialogue where he is transparent about his struggles while giving us the steps he's recognized as important to becoming a better you. Many people say "become a better you," but this book illustrates just how many small things can create the bigger picture of being more comfortable with who you are as a person. It's incredible! Each page taught me something new, or reworded something I knew in a way that made it hit home. Whether or not you think you want to change, Mr. Goldsmith will teach you how you can change when you want to.
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